I believe in love
it comes flowing down from above
it doesn't have to fit like a glove
to be real.
Open up your heart,
you don't have to be smart
from you its not apart
love is art on a deeper level.

I believe in hope
when you look at it from a bigger scope
you hang on to it tight with a rope
you don't let go 
you let it flow
it 'ain't slow
don't free fall.

I believe in prayer
it clears the air
the answers are always there
from the higher power.
You won't have to cower,
it won't leave you sour,
you don't have to climb the tower
to escape the traffic in rush hour.
You don't need willpower,
to believe in yourself.

I believe in trust
my joy's gonna bust,
I won't be turned to dust,
I won't rust,
I have no need for lust
when my mind is clear.
I'm not livin' in a sphere
God, I can go for another beer
no need to live in fear
let's all do a cheer
to be thankful for what we have.

I'm ecstatic
my life is dramatic
not problematic
it isn't static 
I'm not running around frantic 
except when a storms approaching.
That's when I need coaching
I'm not moaning
just keep on coping
I'm not joking
life always has a way of working out.
I believe.

There's a lot more to this world than what we see with our eyes.  The veil is thin.  Look past the veil.

The energy from your hands goes through me
like an electrical current.
The universal life force streams through my body.
I become one with the source,
the living source.
the one true I am.

Lay your hands on me
the hands of love
the hands of love
Lay your hands on me
the hands of love.

The God consciousness pours through me.
I feel a subtle yet powerful change in my being.
Different sensations are over taking me.
My skin feels hot,
and it's like I'm on pins and needles.
I'm calm and relaxed.
I feel the energy going wherever it needs to
go to balance me.
I can't explain it but it's there,
running through my veins.
Its always been there, it's never gone away.
My spirituality is vibrating higher and higher
until I meet myself.
My higher self, my soul.

Lay your hands on me
the hands of love
the hands of love
lay your hands on me
the hands of love.

I'm learning and knowing more spiritual truths.
What was unknown or forgotten,
is now found and remembered.
Love is the highest vibration.
Love all, there is no room for hate.
There is no good and evil for love transcends all.
Love everything around us and within us. 
Your dreams and goals can all be accomplished with 
love at the core freely flowing through you.

Lay your hands on me
the hands of love
the hands of love
lay your hands on me
the hands of love.

Open up your heart
let the river of life cascade through you 
and the current erode your blockages, so 
you can experience the abundance of life
and have all that you need through love.

Lay your hands on me
the hands of love
the hands of love
lay your hands on me
the hands of love.

Everything perishes, but doesn't fade away.

Lay your hands on me
the hands of love
the hands of love
lay your hands on me
the hands of love.

I lay down,
a nervousness overcomes me not knowing what to expect.
The medicine man beats his drum 
It's slow and steady.
The staccato rhythm penetrates through my soul
to the core of my being.

I become one with the sound.
The nervousness wears off.
I slowly close my eyes
I journey to meet my teacher.
My head and body become listless.
I am completely relaxed and drift off
to another state of consciousness
into non-ordinary reality where
spiritual teachers reside.

I climb mount Everest.
the highest mountain in the world.
I'm afraid.
It's tough to get to the top.
I struggle with my breath.
I stop.
Suddenly, without warning I become fearless.

I can do this.  I am not afraid.
In a flash, the air becomes clear, and breathable.
I move ahead with no barriers.
I sense this is a world that has no judgements or negativity.
I feel at home and at peace.

I reach the top and stare toward the horizon.
I gaze above and below.
Such beauty, and majesty.
I see a figure approach me.
Are you my guide?"  I ask.
He answers back to me in my mind.
Telepathy.

"I am the gate keeper, but follow me,
"I will take you to your teacher."
We go to a cave.
There I see a gentle, older woman sitting next to a fire.
She motions to me to come forward and sit.

"Can you see the light through the darkness?"  She asks me.
I tilt my head and raise my eyebrows.

She laughs.
It's a deep hearty laugh,
I'm surprised that it's that type of laugh
from an older woman.

"Of course not, that's why you're here."
She tosses a stick into the fire.
I hear the crackling of the wood, 
and see shadows dance across the cave walls,  
as the flames rise higher , and higher and reach the top.
"What is your question?"
"I have many, but the main one is 
What am I supposed to do with my life?"

She reaches for another stick and
draws pictures in the sand.
I look closely at them but I can't make them out.

"Ahh yes.  Many people have come here asking that very question.  Your life's purpose.  A very important question indeed.
She drops the stick down and
stares into the fire, apparently at a loss for words.

I sigh. I rub my hands together.  Tap my fat up and down.
I get agitated.
I want an answer and I want it now!

"First things first, you need patience.
Breathe.  Be in the moment.  Live in the now.
Second thing's second, I can give you all the answers you need if that's what you want, but any and all answers you seek come from within.  However, you have come here looking for guidance and that is what I'll give you."

I'm mesmerized by her words.

"You have a passion yes?  Something deep within you that you know what you must do?

I nod my head instantly, but 
I think to myself, there's no way I can do that.
I'm not good enough to follow my dreams.
Then she spoke to me like she read my mind. 

"You know what it is.  Your soul knows.  You just forgot.  You let fear and doubt creep in your mind instead of following your passion.  Don't worry about what other people think of your destiny.  Your destiny is your own.  No one can tell you, you can't do something.  You most certainly can.  The universe is on your side. 
The universe of light and love."

"God?"

She throws another stick in the fire.  The flames roar up.

"If that's what you want to call it."
I stare into the fire.  Lost in thought.
A healer I must be I thought to myself.  But how?

I hear beating of the drums.

"I have so much more to ask."

"You can come back anytime you like."

"I will.  Thank you for your guidance."

The beating of the drums pulls me in closer and closer.
It holds me tight.  I can't escape it.  

I retrace my steps from where I came.
The drums get louder.  The beats hypnotic.
I feel myself drift back into consciousness.
I wiggle my toes, and my fingers.
Birds chirp outside.
I take a deep breath and slowly open my eyes.
I am rejuvenated, refreshed, and at peace.
I know what I must do.



 

I woke up at 3 a.m.
dreaming of you in my head
wishing you were in my bed
remembering the day when I lost you
and my last words to you were not said

I love you.
I should have told you
I love you. 
I hope you know that,
I love you
you will always be in my heart,
I love you.

I will remember it always
it's like a movie playing every night in my mind
I wish I could put it on rewind,
so that day would change.
I feel like I'm to blame.
You left on that plane
you'd be back in a day or two
and I only said goodbye
now, all I wanna do is fly
on outta here and 
meet you in heaven
so I can say these words to you 

I love you.
I should have told you
I love you.
I hope you know that,
I love you
you will always be in my heart,
I love you.

I woke up at 3 a.m.
with you on my heart and mind.
It's our anniversary and the years have passed
it's like walking on shredded glass
and I can't seem to find the time to move on.
I don't wanna forget our time we spent together,
every night I drink the same old wine
to dull the pain of how much I miss you,
but it doesn't work.
I'm not doing fine
I wanna take that day away
we will never again have a chance to play.
The guilt is eating me up inside
I'm finding it very hard to take everything in stride.
My stomach is in knots, and tightening with each passing day,
like a noose choking off my emotions which I cannot feel.
There's an open wound
in my soul that won't heal
for not saying the words that were in my heart

I love you
I should have told you
I love you.
I hope you know that,
I love you
you will always be in my heart,
I love you.

I woke up at 3.a.m.
I get out of bed
and stare at the wedding picture of us on the wall.
You're so beautiful.
that day was magical and full of joy.
I take the picture off the hook,
and clutch the photo to my chest.
I'm never gonna rest until I see you again
I will wait for you
and say these words 

I love you
I should have told you
I love you.
I hope you know that,
I love you
you will always be in my heart,
I love you. 

The colors burn brightly in unison
like a beautifully choreographed spectacle,
the wheels of spiritual energy.
Flames radiate from the center
each mingling with one another yet,
on their own separate plane,
unseen by the naked eye but 
felt by the invisible senses.
Our state of health and balance relies on 
them being open.
Our lower base energies need to come together
with our higher spiritual energy so we
can become fully self-realized.
The chakras are the seven tongues of fire.  

Root is the first chakra.  Fiery red.
The base, the start of it all.
The beginning of the energy.
Feeling grounded and connected to the universe rests here.
It's the energy that lets us have 
the fundamental urge to survive.

The sacral, just below the navel, is the second. 
Bright orange, burning brightly as the sun.
Pleasure and emotions rise up.
Primordial sexual energy is built up and 
released until climax.
This is the beginning of the foundation for
creating relationships of all kinds.
The feelings of other people are directly perceived
through mastery of this energy field.

The Solar plexus is next in line.
Yellow is the color shining brightly.
It's the center for unrefined emotions and personal power.
It gives us the sense of complete satisfaction and contentment.
We are the author of our own book.

The heart center is green and glowing.
Spiritual growth, compassion, devotion and love
are at the core.
Its the bridge that connects
the lower and higher spiritual energies.
Its the place where we find our spirit, our true self,
free and independent.

The throat chakra is light blue and shining.  
The center for communication,
self-expression and creativity.

The third eye. Purple forehead.
Its the seat of intuition and direct spiritual vision.
Here we visualize through our third eye.
Intuitive knowledge.
Opening of the third eye is beginning of spiritual awakening,
the center of forgiveness and compassion.

Crown chakra is the jewel of them all.
The highest level of consciousness and enligntment is found here.
It's the connective center to spirit.
When we master the lower vibrational aspects of our being
we reside in the full awareness and know that we are spiritual beings living in a human existence.

The seven tongues of fire
wheels of energy that need to be awakened
to be self-realized.
If they are blocked, disease and
only being able to see the physical reality, takes place.
Balancing the chakras will help us open the 
gate to Christ consciousness and find salvation.
Salvation lies within.
Spirit needs to be brought to earth, its our birthright
The seven tongues of fire will lead us to the promised land.
  

I don’t like to talk about what happened to me much because people would think I’m crazy, although, people already think I’m crazy so I guess that doesn’t really matter.  It happened about five years ago, when I was going through a tough time in my life, but I still remember it like it was yesterday.  It’s a memory that’s implanted in my brain.  I will never forget it.

At the time, me and my wife were in the process of getting a divorce.  She was moving out, on to bigger and better things I guess, and I was left home to figure things out.  Everything was going to change.  Everything familiar was going to be new.  I was afraid.   I was venturing into uncharted territory, I was heading into the unknown, and that scared me to death.  I understand that the only thing constant in life is change, but that doesn’t make things any easier.  Looking back on it now, I realize it was for the best, but that’s for another topic.

I need to get what happened to me off my chest, or I will truly go insane.  It happened on one hot summer evening.  It was in between that zone of light and dark.  Dusk.  That shadowy area where illusion meets reality.  I had to go to the store, but I decided to get gas first.  After that trip, my life would never be the same…..

I came home through the front door.  I felt like a zombie.  I was numb.  I was still stunned as to what happened and not sure where I was.  I must have looked pale and white cause my soon to be ex asked

“Where’d you go? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.?”

I stood motionless.

“You’ve been gone a while. I thought you were just going to the store.”

“I was, but I had to stop and get gas.”

She was fidgeting around, packing up her books and magazines, glancing at her watch. She wanted to be somewhere else.

“It took you that long?”

“We need to talk.” I said as calmly as I could.

A magazine she was holding dropped on the ground with a loud thud. She looked at my quizzically.   She probably was thinking, were getting a divorce, what could possibly be more serious than that?

I walked over to her, took her hand and we sat down together.

“I’ll explain as best as I can. I still don’t believe it myself.”

I took a deep breath and exhaled.

“I was on my way to the store, but saw that I needed gas so I stopped by that new gas station that was built a few months ago. I felt like I was being pulled towards that one for some reason, but I didn’t think anything of it, until after.”

“Being pulled? What do you mean?”

“I’m not sure, like someone or something wanted me to go there.”

She leaned back, rested her chin her hand, and her eyebrows rose up.

“My gait was slow as I headed toward the building. The automatic doors opened.  As soon as I crossed the threshold I knew I was in another time and another place.  In another dimension, altogether.  I shivered.  The room was empty and black. I stumbled as I tried to move forward, my head spinning a thousand miles an hour like a top, and felt as if I was going to pass out.  My mind was in a haze.  Then it got brighter.  My head stopped spinning, my mind was clearer, like sunrise at dawn.  I started to see figures that looked like people.  They weren’t in focus at first.  But then I could see.   I saw one man whose back was to me by the stack of water bottles.   I went to him instantly.    I sort of felt that I was being pushed toward him.  He turned around and my jaw dropped to the floor.  I couldn’t believe my eyes. Could this really be happening? I thought to myself.

My wife stared wide eyed and mesmerized.   I took a deep breath and continued.

I knew that face instantly. Tears rolled down my cheeks. He was beaming with joy.

“Well, you gonna stand there or give your old man a hug?”

We hugged for what seemed like forever, and cried tears of joy and sadness.

“I know I wasn’t around much in your life, and for that I’m truly sorry. I need to let you know that I love you and am so proud of the man you became to be.  I’m honored that you were my son.  You will always be my son.”

I was speechless. I finally uttered.

“Where am I?”

He stared at me with his big grin.

“Heaven’s gas station.”

His smile was slowly disappearing.

“I have to go. I can’t stay. I need to go back.”

“I have so many questions.”

He spoke without moving his lips.

“You will get through this period in your life.   You’ll move forward, and you might not see it now, but you will find love again. Have faith, and know  I love you.”

He stood there slowly disappearing.

My heart sank.

“Don’t go”! I sobbed. Don’t go!  I love you too.”

My father faded into thin air as quickly as he came. My head was spinning, my mind foggy again, everything faded into black.  I stumbled toward the door and knocked over a stack of water bottles, they hit the ground and busted open.  Water sprayed everywhere.

“Next thing I knew I was back in the car.”

My wife stared in disbelief.

“That’s unbelievable.”

She thought for a moment in silence.

“Remember, we were just talking about him a few days ago about how you wish you had closure?”

I got up and headed to the fridge.

“What do you think happened?”

I got myself a beer, took a long swig and went back to the couch.

“I don’t know. A portal to another dimension perhaps.  Whatever it was, it was real.”

We just stared at each other not knowing what to say.

“Well at least you know he’s okay, and he seems at peace, and that there really is a heaven.”

I sat back in the couch and took another swig of beer.

My father was right.   As difficult as it was, I moved on from the divorce, and I have found love again.  This is the happiest I’ve been in years.  You may be in a situation now where things seem hopeless but know that whatever situation you find yourself in, this too shall pass.

This is how dictators get started
They rise to power, shocking everyone
raising fear, doubt
and no hope for the future. 
It's my way or the highway
I won't tell you my plans
I'll shoot and ask questions later
the world will be in the dark about everything
the way it should be
better prepare now, for war is immanent.

In my dream it was time
time to get up 
time to get moving
this is it
the mushroom cloud over my head.
I cried and prayed
to a God that's remained silent.
If you're coming back, now would be the time.
How could it have come to this?

A dictator rises to power
the leader of the free world
we will win
there's no way we can lose
some say there is no such thing as a winnable war
but there are always winners and losers and
our side will win, believe me
just listen to me,
Just love me,
applaud for me.

In my dream it was time
I was fearful inside
I didn't wanna die
what's done is done, no turning back
no time to slack
shovels and dirt, shovels and dirt
it's time to get moving
moving away from the mushroom cloud.

A dictator has all the power.
I said we would win
millions are dead, maybe trillions
I knew we would win
people will respect me now
I transformed the world
to my way of thinking
I'm not contradicting
believe me, it's true.
I wanted to be a better person 
but no one would love me
I wanted love
I needed love
I craved it.
It's your fault it came to this
if you only loved me
if you only loved me.
You are to blame.

In my dream
it was time to get up,
time to get moving
I was fearful inside.
Is this the end?
Can we survive?
Is this real or just a dream?
I can't tell the difference.
God, help me, help us!
Where do we go from here?
I bow my head and pray. 
This is how dictators get started.

 The morning darkness 
 will soon give way to light.
 It's only a matter of time.

 The world as we know it
 will one day perish
 It's only a matter of time.
 A new world will form
 out of nothingness
 it's only a matter of time.

 One way or another, people you love will leave you
 it's only a matter of time.
 Seemingly out of the blue, new people will come into your life
 it's only a matter of time.
 
 Birth will give way to death.
 It's only a matter of time.
 Death will give way to birth.
 It's only a matter of time.

 The truth we are seeking
 shall find us.
 It's only a matter of time.

 The love that has been eluding us
 will be felt in our hearts.
 It's only a matter of time.

I wanted that drug
the drug that could take me higher
the drug that could keep me living
the drug that causes immortality
I needed it
I had to have it
death inspired me to live forever.

I felt the needle chill in my veins
the drug coursing through my body,
like liquid gold.
I closed my eyes and drifted off into the deep recesses of my mind.
I awoke calm and with great mental clarity
nothing could stop me now.  
The days passed normally
then the years drifted on with the routines of life,
still the same old, same old daily grind.
Even though I knew I had to take the drug every 100 years I wondered what was going on.
I finally realized I wasn't the same.
While friends and family grew old, and died
I didn't age at all.

I realized I could be anything I wanted to be
in my wildest dreams.
I could have success, fame,and money,
or poverty and despair.
I could change the world for good or evil
I could find God or the devil. 
I did all those things and more.
I built things up to make heaven on earth,
only to have it destroyed with one push of a button,
and then turn it around and make things new again.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, all the while watching
the phoenix rising.
 
As the centuries dragged on
it got tedious.
I was dying of boredom. 
It was still always the same old thing
rinse and repeat, rinse and repeat
it got old while I didn't.
I didn't want to do it anymore.
I had loved so many times that love lost its soul.
I've grieved so many times death lost its sting.
I've lived so many times life lost its beauty.
I still hadn't found what I was looking for. 
Death had inspired me to live forever 
but now death inspires me to live until my last breath.
I stopped taking the drug.

Now as I lay on my death bed
I chose good over evil
cause that's the way it's supposed to be.
a universal truth.
People come and go in your life
material things rust and fall apart.
Don't get attached to the ebb and flow of life
nothing lasts forever.
This too shall pass.
Listen to these words of the great messiah.
Live in the world, but not be of it.
I didn't believe in hope, now hope surrounds me
A day is a thousand years and a thousand years are like a day,
I broke free from the darkness, and let the light shine through,
and was saved for the very last time.