I’m stuck.
I have nowhere to run to and
nowhere to hide.…
The pain that’s been with me has me
fit to be tied.
I’m low on energy and
low on fuel
I’m about to have a duel
within myself.
Don’t know how much longer I can go.
I’m out of service.

Life's a strange journey.  We're born, we live our lives the best we can day by day, we die, and the cycle continues until we say enough is enough.

Life has been hard and full of pain.
It’s been one big giant stain
I feel like I’m going down the drain
it’s time to refrain
but I can’t. I just can’t.

I don’t believe in love. It doesn’t fit like a glove.
In the sky there is no dove.
I lost my faith,
can’t hesitate,
don’t wanna dissipate,
But I may.

I don’t believe in fairy tales. The good guys never win.
I don’t believe people are supportive
They aren’t gentle
I need to be put in a kennel
they’re all mental
which led me to the state I’m in.

I don’t believe in hope
it slips out of my hands like soap
I try to grab it but I get tangled in the rope
this ain’t dope,
I can’t cope.

I’m free fallin'
I’m desperate
my life has become septic
I’m being tested, Am I the culprit?
If so I wanna make an exit.
I should get down on my knees
I don’t believe in prayer
My hearts gonna tare,
I’m gasping for air,
life ain't fair.

I have extreme anxiety.
God’s nowhere to be seen
I have to come clean,
don’t know how much help that’ll be
I’m gonna scream,
I’m not in a dream.

I just don’t believe.


This is a poem about someone who has no belief in anything.  No belief and no hope.  There is hope in any situation you find yourself in.  You just have to believe and not give up.

Stuck in the middle,
unable to move
where do I go,
what do I choose?
This indecision's killing me
my free will is in battle of will's
not knowing what to do 
is driving me insane.
My determinism is getting the better of me.

The devil's on my left God's on my right
both are talking in my ear
which makes it more disturbing.
I'm caught in between heaven and hell
if I don't decide, I'll stay here and die
I need to find a way to be free.
As I stay here and wait, I know judgment day is near
angel or devil
This is my life,
Buridan's donkey.


Buridan's Donkey is an illustration of a paradox in philosophy in the conception of free will. It refers to a hypothetical situation where a donkey that is equally hungry and thirsty is placed precisely midway between a stack of hay and a pail of water. Since the paradox assumes the donkey will always go to whichever is closer it will die od both hunger and thirst since it can't make any rational decision to choose one over the other. It's named after the 14th centruy French philosopher Jean Burdain. My poem has a different take on it. It's about someone who is deciding to choose between doing something good or something evil.

This poem is about how souls evolve and change over time. it takes many lifetimes to reach the highest possible soul level. In this lifetime we need to learn,grow, and accept change if we want to keep going higher and higher if we want to reach the soul levels that jesus had or Buddah, or any of the great prophets and teachers. We can do it. we need to learn from all the experiences life has to offer us, both good and bad. Most of the time it's the bad things to happen to us that makes us grow. With hope and faith we can reach our full potential in soul growth.

Goodbye old self goodbye.
I'm leaving you behind
so my true self can emerge.
There is no need to cry or ask why.
My true self will become my new self
my new self will become my true self
and then I'll be free,
like the eagle soaring high above the clouds.

I'm not the same person I was yesterday.
I won't be the same person tomorrow.
No tears, no mourning, for this isn't a funeral
it's a celebration of life.
You see, I'm evolving to reach the highest of highs.

The shell of what I once was will no longer be visible.
My soul will ignite and flame the fire within me.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
I'll never look into your eyes the same way again
but don't be sad
because I'll find something beautiful this time.
 
My spirit must die, 
like an exploding supernova and reform into something new,
The transformation is now.
I know my heart will hold on
but it needs to lose the chains that bind me.
I know I'll have scars, but they will be from memories past.
I have no pity for this
is the evolution of my soul.