The deed is done. I slipped out of consciousness and into a new form of reality. The veil has been lifted and now I can see. I checked out. Life became hard. I was going through tough times. I was in pain. Deep, deep pain. Nothing mattered. I was scared and didn't know what to do, actually, I knew exactly what to do but didn't know what the outcome would be. I really didn't want to hurt the one's I left behind, my dear friends and family, but I had no choice. I hid my feelings well. I know people would have tried to talk me out of it so when they asked if I was okay I said yes, even 'till the end. I wanted to do it I have no regrets. Some of you are worried that I am in hell, but the only hell there is, is what man has created in his own mind. There is no separation from God, for God is within us. Hell is when we don't recognize that. I am however, in my own personal hell because I didn't see the God within me. I'm reviewing my life now, and I will come back again, for that is the law of the universe. God forgives and loves, it is truly amazing grace. Don't mourn for me too long dear one's. There is darkness in the night but the sun comes up at dawn. There is hope in life and in death. I want to thank that special person that spoke at my funeral. It was beautiful and moving. I had tears in my eyes. There are many life path potentials to choose from. To be or not to be my friends, that is the question. Always keep me in your thoughts, for I am always in yours. Light a candle in my memory and say a little prayer for me, for God answers them in his own way and time. Hold me close to your hearts,and know I will always be with you.
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