Fade away, fade away
into the light.
Fade away, fade away
into a billion suns.
Fade away, fade away
from the evil that’s underneath.
Fade away, fade away
into space, stars, and dust.
It’s Christmas time yet again
the dreaded feeling of loss of hope and sadness,
of being alone in a crowd, in the darkness.
looking up at the stars and feeling out of place.
That’s the feeling of hopelessness that
always comes from me more often than not,
but especially so this time of year.
Does it always have to be like this?
To be or not to be, that is the question.
Is it time to
Fade away?
To just fade away?
My soul aches for the dreams in my heart
to come to pass.
I pray every day for them to come to fruition
but it always seems to never happen.
My prayers don’t go answered
and yet I believe, and still believe
cause that’s what were supposed to do right?
Maybe its time to fade away
just fade away.
Arguments, disagreements it doesn’t seem worth it anymore
is it time to find the door?
I don’t know what else to do. Pain and confusion are surrounding me.
Maybe this is the time to fade away,
just fade away.
I search for answers where none can be found.
I search high and low,
within, and without
and still no answers.
Don’t know where to turn.
I believe it’s time.
It’s time.
I slowly walk to the bridge with my head hung low
feelings of despair and grief consume me, I can’t take it anymore.
I climb onto the ledge and sit.
I sigh deeply, with tears rushing down my face
I put my face in my hands.
What has brought me to this place of uncertainty?
Fade away.
Everything fades away.
Thoughts of suicide
plans for ending have come into focus.
Why am I here in this world of darkness when I don’t want to be?
Desperation, and anxiety kick in.
Is this the end?
I have light in me somewhere. I just can’t sense it now.
If I let it shine, I guess I’ll be able to see it, but who knows?
I don’t think I can.
Do I wanna be the light of the world?
Don’t know if I can handle the pressure
I couldn’t
handle it before I was here
and I don’t wanna come back.
Fade away. Just fade away
Everything fades away.
Part of me wants to be here, but part of me no,
Just fade away.
There’s a battle going on inside me
I feel like I’m never gonna win.
I need an angel at this very moment.
Right now, hope eternal?
I don’t think so.
Not for me, not in this present moment.
For me, hope will always fade away,
yet I still hang on, but I don’t know why.
I’m clinging on to something unseen.
It’s been like that for months now, I can’t explain it.
It’s like something, or someone is keeping me here
when I don’t wanna stay.
I’m done. I can’t do it anymore.
The hurt, the sadness, the loneliness, being misunderstood.
I’m ready.
I take a deep breath.
I sense something near me, and as I slowly look up
I see a ghostly figure approaching.
I rub my eyes in disbelief.
It couldn’t be, but it is, it most definitely is.
She’s majestic, beautiful.
An angelic face, long red hair.
She slowly walks to me, although I should say float
as I never saw her feet touch the ground.
She put her hand on my shoulder and I instantly felt her vibrant energy.
“Who are you?” I ask?
She smiled, a beautiful smile.
“Brigid.” She said without moving her lips.
I stared in dismay.
“Are you an angel?”
A bright white glow, developed around her.
“I’m everything to everybody. If you resonate with an angel
that’s what I am.”
I did resonate with her.
I felt so calm and at peace.
My wanting to fade away was fading away.
I looked at her in stunned amazement.
“I have so many questions.”
“Ask and you shall receive.” She replied in her soothing voice.
“Why are you here?”
“I heard your prayers.”
She paused for a second.
“And you need me at this very moment, no?”
I balled like a baby.
I nodded my head vigorously.
She pulled me close and hugged me tight.
I never wanted this moment to end.
We broke apart and I looked up at her.
“I try to be a perfect person and please everybody. But I just can’t.
I do the best I can but that’s not good enough.” I said through sobbing tears.
She paused, and held my shoulders.
“That is plenty good enough. We are not asking you to be perfect. Far form it.
No one can be perfect in this 3D reality. All you can do is do your best, and look within.
I think you are doing just fine.”
And then she smiled. Her beautiful smile.
With her by my side,
I didn’t want to fade away.
I took a step back.
I felt ashamed, my head was down.
“Do not feel ashamed.” I heard her say.
“I love you.”
We embraced.
“I’m not going to show you what your life would be like without you here,
you’ve seen that many times before, I will say this though.”
We stepped apart and my head was still looking at the ground.
She put her fingers on my chin and lifted my head up.
“Believe in yourself. believe in God, there is a higher power looking out for you.
Have faith, and trust. ALas, always call on me when you need it. I’ll be there for you.”
The tears stopped flowing from my eyes and I rubbed them.
I looked up and in an instant she was gone.
I inhaled deeply, and exhaled.
Fade away, just fade away.
I heard her voice inside my head.
“Be yourself no matter what, and be proud of who you are.”
I took a deep sigh and felt completely at peace.
It felt like a letting go for me,
A release.
I felt a peace and calm like I haven’t felt in a long, long time.
I felt reborn.
Brigid transformed me.
After a moment or two of silent thought I literally ran off that bridge. I wanted no part of it.
Fade away no more. No more fading away.
At that moment I wanted to live. I wanted to live life to the fullest because
life is worth living, no matter what comes your way.
I wanted to live, and not to fade away.
This poem is about somneone who is thinking about killing themselves on Christmas Eve.
They don’t see any reason for living and are very depressed and lonely.
The time has come, and he plans on ending his life.
An Angel appears before him and guides him on what course of action he must take.